Sophia is almost 4 and likes to hang with the older crowd. She prefers the cool 5 and 6 year olds to kids her own age and thus is constantly wondering when she will lose her first tooth and meet the amazing tooth fairy. She knows exactly what to look for and daily feels her teeth to see if any are wiggly. This girl is ready to say goodbye to those babies and get some big girl toofers and more importantly, the tooth fairy prize.

She made a little video explaining the process and the aforementioned prize. Show this to your kids if they are wondering how this exciting process works.  The best part?  Our tooth fairy brings pennies!  I just love it – the tooth fairy is on a budget too!

Yes, I know that she will realize a penny does not buy much and at some point will ask for the big money or a Wii or something our tooth fairy cannot afford. I’m thinking of telling her that our tooth fairy has fallen on hard times and see how she takes the news.

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Sophie and Miles Display their Silly Bling

The kids are obsessed with Silly Bands.  Essentially they are rubber bands that when off your arm take the shape of an animal or object.  Miles’ favorite is the purple Train.  Sophia’s is a purple and white castle and a pink mermaid.   When piled on your arm these bring me right back to the jelly bands and charm necklaces and yes, garbage pail kids of the 80’s and I can’t believe that my kids are old enough to actually participate in a fad. 

This Silly Band craze is so easy.  It’s about $5 for a pack of 24 similarly themed bands in multiple colors.  There are no nasty themed bands that I have come across although I am sure some perv makes them and I will admit some well loved bands do take on a definite phallus shape.  Oh well, that just makes it funnier for me when Sophie asks me why I am laughing at the inchworm and then follows up with “Mommy, do you want this one”?  No honey, keep your little penis.  Mommy is okay.

These Silly Bands are nothing like the last fad I can remember – the Garbage Pail Kids.  Doug Plug, Smelly Sally, Adam Bomb, Meg-A-Volt and the rest of the gang were nasty booger and puke and death inspired cards in the 80’s that me and my brother collected, traded and found absolutely hysterical.  I am sure our parents and parents the country over, feared for our generation.  These cards are disturbing.  I am always honest though – they are part of my childhood so I remember Bone Head Fred (his barber exposes bone on his skull) with fondness.

To be honest, the silly bands are totally positive.  I am completely stoked.  I  think they look cool on and I kid you not – these are teaching lessons.

Sharing:  If you have a majillion silly bands on your wrist and you wear them out and you meet a friend with no rocki’ bands of their own you MUST give that friend enough to rock some serious silly bling of their own.  This is not optional.  The kids do not get to take one measly band off.  They each must share a lot.  This has been a great lesson and now both Sophia and Miles love to give silly gifts to their friends and are even getting better with sharing other toys at home.

Appropriate Play:  All the trading and on and off is not good for school or temple or the dinner table.  The bands could also be a choking hazard for a little one so the kids are not allowed to wear these to school or to meals and they are learning that some things are really awesome and fun but might not be okay 24/7.  For some reason they are starting to get it and now remind me that it’s time to take our bands off.

Trading Skills:  Like baseball cards or sticker books, the kids trade these bands.  There are thousands of colors and designs and they want to get as many as possible.

Counting and Colors and Organization:  We count our silly bands.  We organize them by color or shape or theme.  We put them in special little boxes.  The kids enjoy tallying their numbers and announcing their wealth of bands in numbers.

So you see, these little bands are not so silly after all.  I am going to relish in this little fadwith my kids and enjoy the pleasure of a feel good fad before they are so old that they want to play with guns or get tattoos or any of the other crap that I am sure is in my future!

What fads are in your house?  What do you remember coveting as a child?  I would just love to know what else is out there and what I have to dread  look forward to!

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This is third of five posts over ten days as part of Momalom’s Five for Ten.  We are all writing about the same topics in an honest effort to get to know one another better and make more connections.

Our first topic was Courage.   The second was Happiness.  Today’s is Memory.

If you are already a regular Mommy Words visitor, I hope you enjoy these posts.  If you are here as a part of the Five for Ten, welcome!  I can’t wait to get to know you.

Many people laugh when they hear all the places we take our very young kids.  Some say “Why go through the hassle?  They won’t remember”.  Some people’s mouths drop open.  There are even crazies who imply we “force” them to do things they aren’t old enough for.  I say…as my mom said before me…”PSHAW!”

My kids are 3, 2 and 15 weeks. I readily admit, I do not remember the days before about my 4th birthday, but I am sure glad my mom did not  think it was a waste to take me to the zoo or a museum for the first 4 years of my life just because my little brain might not forever remember blowing out my first birthday candles or petting my first goat or walking into my first day of pre-school.  Likewise, I’m sure glad she decided to have me at all, seeing as I don’t remember my birth and all.  I think I probably liked being born and all that birthday cake and goat petting and stuff.

We drag take our tots as many places as possible because I believe that even if they don’t remember, these experinces help their precious minds to grow.  Going lots of places also  aids in social development and has helped me to teach important lessons about acceptance, patience and even money!  As an extra benefit, the more active we are, the less bored I am and the more likely it is they will nap.  I am not the only one who thinks that really cool experiences plus a really great nap makes for great days. Right?

Yes, it is often tiring and takes a lot of planning.  Yes, sometimes we have massive meltdowns and contemplate never leaving the house again.  Yes, these trips are primarily for the kids and usually lack the sort of relaxation and fruity cocktails that are nice on a vacation day.  But I have no regrets.  I just have thousands of wonderful memories.

I capture all of our experiences with my camera or Flip Video and we spend lots of time picking out our favorites, making albums and sending them to family and friends.  We re-live all of our experiences by talking about each trip for days on end.  Many therapists think this kind of repetition, where children learn the words to associate with their experiences, will actually help them remember.

I have to honest here.  While they may not remember, I WILL.  If I am wrong and my kids do not get any social, intellectual or physical benefits from all of our activities over the past 3 years, I am creating memories that will last for my whole life.  These experiences with my kids are precious to me as I see them open their eyes and hearts to the world around them and watch the huge smiles spread across their little faces.

In the spirit of getting to know me, here are some of my favorite memories with my kids out and about the country.

We alwasys go to the zoo.  Actually, I think we go to every zoo and aquarium whenever we are within 90 minutes of one.  Asheboro, Columbia, Charleston,  Baltimore, New Orleans, San Antonio, Orlando…where there are animals you will find us!  We have done this since Sophia started pointing to animals.  The kids love animals and have a fabulous time.  I have a ball watching them have a ball.  It makes us all happy!   How could I miss this excitement on Sophia’s face at 1?

A 1 year old thinks it is pretty awesome and very silly when a gorilla picks his nose and eats it.  So do I.  You should never get so old that this does not make you giggle.  And your kids are almost never too young to find this funny.

At the Reston Zoo in Virginia, Miles got licked by this camel when he tried to kiss it.  Unforgettable and yes, he stil tries to kiss animals.  Sheep, cows, horses…he has smooched ‘em all.

We usually go to Charleston, S.C. for New Years and find so much to do with the family.  When Sophia was 2 and Miles was 8 months old we went to Patriots Point, home of the U.S.S. Yorktown aircraft carrier and TONS of airplanes.   We explored the ship and then ran around the flight deck on a cold winter morning.  It was wonderful!

I loved taking the kids to the Angel Oaktree believed to be more than 1500 years old.  It is enormous at 25 feet in circumference and providing 17,000 square feet of shade.  It is also breathtakingly beautiful.

We rocked Washington D.C. while visiting my mom last year and hit the best parts for little kids in most of the National museums.   The National Building Museum was the kids’ favorite.  Why?  You can actually build things and run around in this giant open hall!

The Smithsonian and the Natural History Museum were not far behind.  We all had a BLAST at the National Air and Space Museum.  Little kids are pretty impressed by big airplanes and oh yeah..space ships.  We learned how to dye wool at Mount Vernon and watched a sheep being shorn.  She may not really remember it, but I will remind her how cool she thought the Washington Monument is…even at 3…she could see that Obelisks pretty much rock.

Our best and most recent trip was to Disney World.  After4 days, 3 parks and thousands of pictures I would say we made memories that will last a lifetime.

So now you know.  My tagline really could be Have Kids…Will Travel. 

I think we can make wonderful memories with our kids in much simpler ways too.  We are blessed to have family in so many wonderful places and be able to travel with our kids to add these very special experiences to thir early years.

I would love to hear where you have made your favorite family memories and would LOVE to hear what your child’s earliest memory is.  I mean come on – is there any chance they will remember any of this?

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The Castle Before a Show

Many people looked at me like I was a looney bin when I told them we were taking our kids to Disney World for 4 days and 3 parks.  Sophia is 3.  Miles celebrated his 2nd birthday at Disney.  Violet was just 13 weeks old.  I am here to say that each and every day was magic.  I saw more smiles in that time than in the last year as my kids enjoyed rides, met characters, saw amazing shows and explored the different lands of the Magic Kingdom, Epcot and the Animal Kingdom.

There is a whole side of Disney that is made for little ones, perfect for encouraging imagination, getting their first thrill of a ride, learning about different places around our country and our world and yes, practicing patience.  Disney has a whole program called Magical Beginnings for their smallest friends and they treat every little girl and boy like the prince or princess we all know they are.  Disney made my kids feel like their dreams came true! 

There was a lot of planning that went into this trip to make sure we got the most out of every day.  I am going to write a series of posts on planning your trip with small children and I will give you my super successful itinerary for each of the parks we visited.  If you can, put Disney World on your list.   You will be tired at the end, but you will never forget the magic.

Why?  Because kids this young BELIEVE the magic.  The kids think that Mickey and his friends live in Toon Town.  They think Cinderella and her friends live in Cinderella’s Castle at the Magic Kingdom or Akershus at Epcot.  They believe that each and every day all of their favorite Disney friends have a huge dance party and that they were invited.  Sophia was astounded that Minnie invited her to the dance party by the castle and that Belle invited her to breakfast.  Miles gave priceless bear hugs to giant fuzzy characters that he knows are his friends.  He loves them.   

Sophia was a Princess and met Belle, Ariel, Snow White, Mulan, Cinderella, Pohahontas and Sleeping Beauty.  Hello?  Could anything be better for a 3 year old?

Sophia and Belle at Akershus Royal Banquet Hall

Miles finally rode Dumbo (which he has been watching of YouTube for months) and got to see Dumbo in front of the castle.   You cannot see Miles in the picture.  Kids must sit on the inside.  Still, Ross is having a blast!

Ross Enjoys Dumbo with Sophia and Miles

Miles is 2 – so even the little Iron Dumbo was awesome for him! 

Miles and Dumbo the Elephant

Lest you think we forgot our littlest princess Violet – nope!  She had a great time snuggling with Mommy, riding rides (yes, there are tons of family rides) and meeting the princesses and fairies like her.  Actually, Violet was a huge hit with all the characters.  Mommy LOVES the pictures!

Violet Meets Tinkerbell's Friend Fawn

We loved our Disney vacation and I am trying to plan another trip as soon as possible!  I will be posting all my juicy travel tidbits, reviews of rides and attractions, tutorials on making your own rockin’ character autograph book and of course, my itineraries so stay tuned!

Should you take pre-schoolers to Disney?  My answer is a resounding yes!

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I got pulled aside at carpool today for the first time. Ms. Gretchen needed to tell me that my darling Sophia is the mean girl in class since Jenna showed up.

Sophie's Mean Face

Jenna is the new girl. Sophia talks about her all the time. She wants Jenna to be her BFF and come to her tea party. It is going to be Sophia, Jenna and Corinne. Turns out that means her friend Cecilia is out. Literally – Sophia told her that the empty seat their table was not for her – she was out. Sophie actually laid herself over the chair. She lost her time in the gym and sat with the teacher. I almost lost my lunch.

WTF? I was instantly transported back to Heathers, back to Molly Ringwald, back to Mean Girls. I was immediately feeling the nausea I can still remember from my youth.  I always had a lot of friends, but we moved a lot, and I was always one of the first ones out when the girls got nasty. 

And yes, girls do get nasty.  From a very young age they form cliques.  They learn that skinny is good and long hair is good and nice clothes are good (this is one of the only pictures I have of Sophia in pants).  And when they form cliques and see special groups they see power – they know how it feels to lead the masses – and how it feels to be left behind. 

Sound dramatic? To a little girl, or a junior high schooler, or a teenager – IT IS LIKE THE END OF THE WORLD.  Even if you have good friends and you know who you are – to be the target of the mean girls is a huge fear.  From reading the news you all know to be a target of any bully is now a very dangerous game. 

Our children are precious and whether they are 3 or 10 or 16 the emotional stakes are high.  I firmly believe we need to guide them from an early age to include others and act with kindness to ALL.  I think we should ask about their friendships and pay attention to the dynamics.  Whatever side our kids are on we need to guide them with love, and discipline, when necessary. I have to believe that as a mother I can make a difference.

My biggest parenting fear beyond my children’s health  is to have kids who are mean to others, who are exclusive instead of inclusive.  Kids who are selfish and mean.  This kind of child would break my heart.

So I talked to Sophia about feelings and about kindness.  We did not do any other punishment at home.  She was punished with a time out at school.  She cried.  She told me she knew she was being mean and she wanted to make the rules.  Both Sophia and Cecilia have strong personalities.  I knew part of this had to do with Sophia being the boss.  I told her about how important friends were and how we don’t always get to pick the rules.  I told her how we love all of our friends even if they are different from us.  I told her we need to always make room for others at our tables.

I hugged her and asked her if she was mean to Cecilia.  She said yes, and my heart broke a little.  But then, she said she did love her friends, and that she wanted to be a nice girl. 

I kissed her and said she would have to be nice or we would not have a real tea party at the house.  I’m the mom so I can say that kind of thing and be mommy – not bossy – you know.  She is only 3, so she said I was kidding and laughed at me and then she saw I was not kidding.  She stopped laughing.  she REALLY wants to have a fiary tea party at the house.

For the time being, I think she will be nice.  We’ll see what happens as she “blossoms”.

Now, as a grownup, I am going to apply the same rules in my own life.  Be a friend to everyone.  Let others be the boss. Make room at the table.  These simple things never go out of style. 

Here’s to acceptance, kindness and friendship.

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Call me Miss Flibbertyjibbit but I am too pregnant to write anything really coherent despite the fact that I am completing another fabulous DIY Project.  Well, at least I think it is fabulous.  It will just be a couple of days late.  Who wants to bet I will have to re-post the tutorial after the baby?  Now to my point – see – I have lost it….

Ghost Bunny

The good news is that the new game Sophia and Miles play does not involve me at all so I am free to do whatever the hell I do not remember doing in the first place.  This game is called Ghost Bunny and I tried googling it but I have no idea where the rules came from.  I know it is some combination of a Max & Ruby episode entitled “Ghost Bunny”  dealing with camping out and flashlights and both of my kids’ obsession with jumping out of things.

In this game Sophia and Miles shut themselves in her closet with just a tiny flashlight that has barely any light and then they tell secrets or something – I can only hear whispers – until at some point Sophia gives a signal and they open the door and jump out running in circles and yelling “Boo!”  Then they both dissolve into hysterical laughter, immediately talk about how great the game is and go back into the closet.  They will stay in that closet for 5 minutes or more and they will play this game FOR AN HOUR.  I am not allowed to play.  Usually I am forced to play games but I am left miraculously on my own for Ghost Bunny Time.  All I have to do is look scared when they decide to “scare” me.  Usually they do this to me when I am in the shower in the morning.  All I have to say is that they are CRAZY – at 38 weeks pregnant and naked trying to wield a razor I am the really scary one. 

Note: Please – do not call social services – Sophia and Miles can both open the closet door by themselves and when I am in the shower I do put a little thing on the top so it will not close all the way and chop off their little bunny fingers.  They are relatively safe during Ghost Bunny compared to some of the gymnastics games they play.

I do not have any idea what they do in there but here is a quote from the Max & Ruby episode.  Valerie is telling a story and says

There’s no escaping Ghost Bunny. His ears are so big he can hear the tiniest sound across town.

Sophia always says no one will get away and she asks me if I can hear them because she says I am not supposed to.  And I have big ears.  I am VERY self conscious about them.  But I cannot hear them.  Usually they are screaming.  In this they whisper.

Is this not the best game ever?  I don’t have to play and they are basically silent.  If I knew the actual rules to Ghost Bunny I would totally share them with you.  This game is second only to the Quiet Game, which Sophia says “totally stinks”.  If I figure out how to get them to play that – you can give some giant mommy prize.

The Missing Brain

If you see my brain, let me know.  I think it might have fallen out of my huge ears.  I can’t remember anything.  I am saying words that do not exist.  I am responding to people who have not said anything.  I am lost all the time.  I do not ever know what time it is.  I feel like a raving lunatic.  Even Sophia asked “Mommy are you being crazy or just silly or are you saying a joke?”  Of course I lied and said I was joking.  I do not want my 3 year old thinking that I have lost my mind and with it every ounce of authority.  So if you have any advice – I’d love to hear it – but I expect this is just what is known as Baby Crazy.   I should just use it as an excuse to act like a fool and bear absoltely no shame or blame.

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Sophia's First Plane Trip - 8 Weeks

First, Are you Crazy?

Are you sure you want to get on a plane with your little ones? This might be one of the top 10 times as a parent you will reconsider having kids in the first place.  I love to travel and decided to just push through and bring the kids so I have seen a lot of families fly and I have experienced the woes of airline travel many a time.  Before you plan your trip, make it easier by using some or all of these tips to keep mom and kids happy travelers!

This is a long post and obviously if you don’t have small children you will not want to be bothered.  Please feel free to browse the rest of my Mommy Words for something more up your alley.  For those of you in the same place as me with your kids….here is the scoop!

Choosing a Destination

This applies to vacation planning rather than the mandatory Thanksgiving, Christmas, Baptism or Bat Mitzvah travels in your future.  Remember when planning your trip while your kiddos are sleeping that you are now planning a family trip and that those lovely snoozing kids will be awake for a good part of it. 

For me, once I do this it usually involves me realizing that for a family trip to a tropical beach, an East Coast island would work better than Hawaii – no connecting flights, no time changes and short!  This same thought process should go through your head before you book that incredible resort vacation only to figure out on the way there that 1. kids don’t do well on 12 hour travel days with a layover in Chicago and 2.  kids prefer some things for kids to do at their destination. You will be happier in the long run knowing that you can handle getting to your destination and that you have some things planned for your angels!

I have a future post on recommended destinations and activities!

Planning the Trip

Figure out which airline you are using and see if they have special fares for children and what all of their policies are.  Check on airport regulations to ensure as few hiccups as possible.  You will want to make sure that you are not trying to bring anything through security that is not allowed to avoid delays and the confiscation of your things.

Seating

Infants / Toddlers in lap: While this is not recommended, it is free and most airlines will allow a parent to bring a child under 2 years old on their lap.  Be aware that usually you can only have one lap child per row due to the number of oxygen masks and plan accordingly.  Even if you have booked your ticket online it is always a good idea to call the airline and confirm that you are traveling with an infant and make sure they have his name.  You want to make sure they have this in the system.

Infants / Toddlers in a Seat:  This makes a huge difference.  If you can afford it or a less full flight makes it doable at the last minute I would say hands down to go for it.  You can buckle your baby in to his own car seat and have the chance for a relaxing flight.  If you are flying alone with your baby as I often did, this seat made the difference between a day of terror and a slightly difficult travel time.  Particularly as babies turn into toddlers, sharing a seat becomes a dicey proposition.  I actually crouched on the floor for a good part of one flight to save the other passengers from Sophia’s temper fit to sit by herself.  We will not fly that way again!  In addition, safety wise it is best that even babies have their own seat so that if there is a crash, they are buckled in as they would be in a car and as you are.  The seat will also have the extra padding to protect their little bodies.

Bassinet Option: If you are traveling internationally you will want to call and see if the airline has infant bassinets and reserve one as early as possible.  This will make those long overnight flights infinitely easier on the while family and the rest of the plane!

Pre-School / Booster Seat Age:  If your child is still in a car seat and it is FAA approved with a back then bring it if you can and you will need a car seat at your destination.  If you do not have the ability to bring a car or booster seat on the plane or you do not want to lug a car seat through the  airport you should definitely look into the CARES (Child Aviation Restraint System) meant for children between 22 and 40 pounds.  It is the only FAA approved restraint system and from the looks of it – this product rocks and weighs only 1 pound!

Note:  You will not be allowed to use just the booster portion of any chair as airplanes only have lap belts and boosters are meant for raising a child to be at the right position for a shoulder belt.    You should check your booster seats along with your luggage.   Most airlines will allow you to check car seats / booster seats with no extra baggage penalty.

Seating Assignments:  Reserve your seats in advance whenever possible to ensure the family is sitting together or that you have seats closest to a bathroom or whatever your preferred seating is. Then, get to the airport with plenty of time so that you are checked in before all the other people the airlines overbooked on the flight.  You can see the seating configurations of most planes online.  This is important as a lot of people are not willing to change seats, as sad as that is, for families to sit together.  I have seen many people ask and be turned down.

Sleeping Plan 

Know in advance where your kids will sleep and plan accordingly.  Many hotels have cribs or pack n plays for guests to rent and after lugging a pack n play on a trip before realizing this I can tell you it is more than worth it!  If you are visiting friends or family check if they know someone who can lend you a pack n’ play for your stay.  Most families with young children have one and this is free!  If you are traveling with your child’s pack n play, consider using a tent for infants and toddlers.  We have a toddler tent and all the kids have loved it.  We even use it to play in at home and it provides hours of entertainment, which makes it a great buy.  Ours fits inside the large suitcase as will most so we do not have an extra item to check or carry.  Let me tell you, travelling with a pack n play or small travel bed is not fun.  With new airline restrictions on the number of checked bags it may also get expensive.  I would find a way to have sleeping arrangements at your destination if you don’t go the tent route whether through a rental company, a friend or hotel.

Health Plan

In addition to checking a whole bag of little medical stuff (see below) I always find the name of a pediatrician or clinic near where we will be staying as well as the closest and best hospital or children’s hospital.  It would be great to find a pharmacy as well and make sure you have your pharmacy benefits information.  I like to have these numbers handy and yes, I have been to many urgent care clinics with sick kids in a few different states.  When my kids get sick, it is on vacation!  Make sure you have your insurance cards with you!

What to Check

You will want to bring, if possible, car seats or booster seats for your kids.  From experience I can tell you that those available through car rental agencies are not that great.  You will also need to check your pack n play or other large baby items.  Car seats should not count as baggage and if you get one of those car seat bags let me tell you you can fit a LOT of stuff in them.  We fit all diapers and baby stuff for a 2 week trip in Sophia’s car seat bag when she was little!

I always bring a little medicine bag with children’s and infants Tylenol or Motrin as well as some little tummies and nasal spray, bandaids, diaper cream, aspirator, thermometer and and any other health goodies.  You do not want to be looking through a yellow pages for a late night pharmacy when your child gets sick on vacation.

While when travelling alone I check as little as possible with kids I do the opposite – check what you do not need in the airport or on the plane.  The less stuff you are lugging through the airport in addition to your bindles of joy – the better!

If you do not want to bring any large baby items there are agencies around many big cities that will rent them.  You can find them easily on google.

Packing for the Plane Trip

Think essentials: 

1.  Change of Clothes: 1 shirt for you and 2 outfits for each child in diapers, 1 outfit for fully potty trained kids

I have needed both changes of clothes more than once and I love having an extra shirt for me.  Whether its poop or throw up or I am just covered in sweat, something is always making me feel disgusting! Let me tell you, when a baby goes on a plane it always seems to be #2 and it always seems like a bad one!

2.  Feeding Items:  Bottles, formula, spoons, small bowls or snack traps etc.  Pay attention to what snacks or drinks are allowed through security.  The rest you will have to pick up for a million dollars on the other side.  This million is worth it to have snacks!  Mothers are allowed to bring breast milk or formula through to feed babies but not water.  This will hold you up big time if you take the wrong stuff so edit bags before the security line!  Don’t forget your bottles and sippy cups.  Spills are not fun on a plane.  Even if your 2 year old is on a regular cup at home, consider taking out a sippy cup for the plane.

3.  Diapers and Wipes and Sanitzer: More than you ever thought possible – triple it.   For wipes – especially in this flu season – use them on everything and bring sanitizer too!

4.  Toys / Books / Comfort Items:  50% of your job is to keep your child entertained and as happy as possible for the flight.  Making a list in advance of favorites is a good idea!  The other 50% of your job is as follows – 25% make sure you do not lose them and they arrive in one piece and 25% manage bathroom emergencies.

If your child loves his pacifier or blankie or little bunny rabbit – plane trips are not the time to yank these comfort items or forget them.  Believe me – you will wish you hadn’t when you get stuck on the runway.  Even if you have recently weaned your child off his or her lovie – BRING IT!

Travel Dress

This is it – simple and layered.  I have learned the hard way that onesies and planes do not a match make. Anything that does not have to come off over the head is great if you have a poopie accident!  Get some elastic pants or snap up pants for baby and use a t-shirt or button up shirt and then add additional layers.  The temperature on planes can vary wildly – think anywhere from a desert to the arctic and you want to be prepared without you or your baby being stuck inside your garments.

Make sure it is easy to take off your shoes and your child’s for security and that both you and your husband / travel partner if you have one discuss who will do what when going through security.

In the Airport

Transportation:  Bring a stroller or a sling to carry those little ones around.  Airports are busy and fast paced and whether you have a tiny baby or a darling 3 year old the airport is not the place to test grown up skills and get them to keep up.  If your child wants to walk then you can use the stroller to carry stuff so you can keep a better eye on Miss Independent. If your child is not cooperating with you, strap her in and have a chance at making your flight.  Strollers are usually checkable at the gate so you can have this godsend right until you board and right when you get off.

You may want to check out the Tote a Tot  or something similar if you want to really streamline your stuff in the airport.  It attaches your car seat to your roller suitcase so you have no stroller to check and no toddler running around the airport.  Ah – I love new inventions!

We finally got a car seat carrier when we advanced to the Britax and tried lugging it through the airport.  We have one that is like a backpack and love it.  There are also over the shoulder strap models and roller models but I always find free hands to be a big plus so a backpack was the best option.

On the Plane

Diaper Duty:  Call the airline or go online to check out your plane to see whether there are changing tables on the plane.  Many smaller planes do not have this luxury so seating arrangements will be important – especially if you are traveling with an infant in your lap.  If there is no table you will either have to use the closed toilet seat in the bathroom or use your seat.  If you have #2 you really need to do the dirty work in the bathroom unless you have the whole row to your family.  Sometimes a wonderful flight attendant will offer the large floor area in the back or the use of the flip down seat – but in my experience this is rare.

Breast Feeding:  Your baby has to eat and breastfeeding is perfectly okay on planes.  In fact, you should nurse on takeoff and landing to ease any ear discomfort your child might have.  If your child is in a seat you may use a pacifier for this or, if like my baby, yours will not take a pacifier, you can put your clean finger in his mouth and this usually works.  Nursing on a plane is one of the only times I might recommend a nursing shirt and / or a nursing cover.  If you don’t have one, a shirt that pulls down from your breasts and not up over your whole torso is best so that you will have as much coverage as possible.  A nursing cover is great on planes too.  My favorites are the Bebe au Lait and the Hooter Hider.  Both will double as blankets in an emergency too!  Mine once even doubled as my extra bottom when 2 pairs of pants were soiled!

Bottle Feeding:  Airlines will allow milk through security for babies and they will allow you to bring through pumped milk if you are travelling alone and need to bring back that liquid gold!  However, I would recommend mixing the formula for the take off bottle before you get on the plane as the only water they will have is steaming hot or bottled water.  If you mix it on the plane with bottled water this is fine too – just don’t mix it with the hot water.  This is the boiling hot water that will take 30 minutes to cool off.  Ask for a cup of it to place your bottle in to warm it to the temperature you want.  Check that caps are securely back in place after feeding to avoid a really messy spill in your travel bag!  Most bottles have caps that can be placed over the bottle instead of the cap over the nipple to avoid leaks.  This is what these were made for.

Activities:  Bring some special toys for your kids on the plane.  You can wrap up a few little things and let your child have a great time opening her treats every half hour or hour.  Making them harder to open with lots of bows will take extra time and the decorations work as toys as well!  Favorite books are a must as well as coloring books and washable crayons for those old enough to draw.  Try to avoid loud musical toys as they will quickly annoy other passengers and they will sound 10 times louder than you thought they would!  If you are okay with it, a travel DVD player is great.  A movie and a show and then you land…perfect!  Basically just try to bring things that are easy to pack and fun for the kids without being a pain to other passengers.

Finally

Enjoy your Trip!  Happy Flying!

Have your own tips and tricks for the air?  We’d love to hear them.  Please leave comments for all the other jet setting mommies like you!

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In honor of the new movie Motherhood, Scary Mommy (actually a lovely mommy named Jill) is looking for some other Scary Mommies out there.  Since I have some pretty scary motherhood moments I am entering my own terrifying post!     I am at least 6 ways to scary – if not more.  Some are funny and well, some are really scary.  I am just glad to know there are other moms out there going through the same things!  Thank you Jill, for leading me to my people!

Let’s just get this out of the way.  In my opinion, if I were to walk around naked on the night of Halloween, people would be scared.  Sophia has already told me that my body looks scary.  First of all, I was not always body scary.  Before all the cancer risk stuff I went in the sun and had an nice glow.  Before I had kids my boobs were perky and a good, steady size.  I had nice skin.  My tummy did not have stretch marks.  And the kicker, you could not see all the veins in my entire body.

Yes, you heard me right.  Sophia asks what is wrong with me.  When I was pregnant with Sophia, my husband asked the same thing.  I am pale.  I mean white as a ghost pale.  When a pale chick like me gets pregnant, the increased blood flow through my body makes my veins resemble a highway map across my whole body, most prominently displayed on my boobs and chest.  I literally have BRIGHT BLUE lines running all over my chest and boobies, down my arms into hands that glow there are so many veins!  It is pretty scary looking!

Moving from my boobs down to my belly – it just don’t look like it used to round these parts.  The veins run through tatas that were a C before all these babies.  Then, with my ENORMOUS milk supply, they swelled to an E. You heard me, an E, after I had Sophie.  Then after nursing two babies for a year, they shrunk down to a small B and lost a good deal of their perkiness.  Now, they are growing again but so are the nips (as you know if you have been preggers) and so now, in my opinion my nips are too big for the boobs.  And while there are no veins popping out on my pelvis, there are stretch marks courtesy of my babies, who are always born late and drop early.  Thanks guys.  Again, scary.  Man I want my good boobs back.

Oh, like many other moms, I also am not able to get in a good shower every day, have boogers wiped on me constantly, sometimes find spots of poop from a wayward diaper change on me and oh yes, when I am pregnant my nose runs constantly.

So here I am naked with blue veins running all over my death pale body with nips too big for my boobs and stretch marks down to my hoo ha with a huge belly and this whole lovely picture has boogers and poopie on it.  And I am making funny noises to try and keep the boogers in my head.

Told you I was scary.

My kids do ask me to be scary.  Even Miles, who cannot speak, has a special mumble for scary faces and monster games.  It started with singing songs like the Purple People Eater and acting it out.  Then, I am a big theater chick so we always play games where we are monsters or animals or princesses.  Well, Sophia is usually the princess and by request, I am the scary monster.  Miles just toddles around like a pee wee Frankenstein.  No words but if he sits on you you’ll be sorry.  My hubby is a hot ticket for this game too.  He is a great monster and adds tickles to the mix.  We love to roar, to pretend to breathe fire, to make ugly scary faces.  And yes, we do jump out of corners and actually scare them sometimes.  So far, they have always laughed afterward.  I am proud to be a Scary Mommy Monster.

I know this about myself.  Sometimes I just run out of steam.  Sometimes I want to take the easy way out.  I definitely am honing this skill with kids.  First, all activities are now close to home.  We no longer drive 20 minutes to the kiddie gym.  We put tons of pillows on the floor and have our own kiddie gym.  Sophia and Miles have pre-school less than 1 mile from our house.  Sophia’s ballet – 1.2 miles.  Sophia’s soccer – 1 mile.  Most of our play dates are on our block.  Some of this has to do with the fact that Miles still naps and Sophia has not taken a snoozer since she turned 2.  More of it has to do with my not wanting to haul them all over the place.

Lazy Scary also means that I fully believe that “Noggin is like Preschool on T.V.”  If I am busy – they can watch shows.  If I am super crabby – they can watch a show.  If I really don’t feel like doing cutting exercises with Sophia – they can watch a show.  Usually they play with the show in the background but still – I put that tube on and expect to get a little break for it.  I will admit to you that Miles’ first word was definitely DORA.  It is still the word he says most clearly.  He has the major hots for her.  He should since he has seen her since birth!    What can I say, I am really tired with these two and anther on the way.  I have let Sophia watch shows in order to get her to lay in my bed so I can take a nap.  I have let them watch something in the morning so I can sleep for another 15 minutes…or 30.  It is just the easy way out…actually…it is scary how easy it is.

Let’s just say Miles can also say nugget.  As in chicken nugget.  And I like to cook.  Let me rephrase, I liked to cook.  Before I was cooking for kids while they go through everything in the kitchen, ask to help crack the eggs, pour the milk, turn on the stove…the list goes on.  Making dinner is now a nightmare.  It takes forever to make something that at least recently, I have a 30% chance of success with.  My kids never want dinner.  That is, they never want dinner at the table with vegetables and milk and such.  They always want dinner on the porch at their kids table with their Happy Meal and their toy.   They also like Nutri Grain bars for breakfast, Lunchables for lunch at school (although I have stopped this because my husband got so mad), Wendy’s Chicken Tenders and KFC Popcorn Chicken.  Yes, we do this once a week.  I am embarrassed.  No, we don’t supersize, but still.  Scary.

Sometimes mom comes first, and please don’t think it is one of those things where moms need some time too.  I get some time.  Pre-school is my little miracle in the mornings.  This is just me being selfish and picky and not always wanting to share.  So do I sound like my scary toddler to you yet?  I hide expensive candy, my weakness, so that I do not have to share.  When we color or do crafts, we both have our own projects or pages because I really hate it if my stuff gets messed up.  Maybe I am anal retentive scary too!  When we go to the mall with the play place, sometimes we go in the other entrance that is near Anthropologie so I can go in my store for just a few minutes and we don’t have to go on the jumpies.  If I get a milkshake or frosty (see above) I put it in the freezer right away to be my treat later.  Sometimes I give them a bite first.  Not usually.  I know this behavior is scary because I feel bad about it.  I’m trying to teach my kids to share and be honest and instead I am hiding away my treats and hoarding my beautiful pictures with all colors in the lines.  Boo on me.

I am not exactly who I thought I would be as a mother.  I truly believed, despite what my own lovely mother told me, that I would be a sea of beauty and calm surrounding my children.  I thought my love for them would be so great that I would always WANT to put them first, that I would never regret leaving my job, that I would always have on the front of my head and heart that I am a mother and I love my kids more than anything in the world.  I do love them this much, but in truth, it is scary how often my love for them is not the first thing on my mind.

Having a very sensitive, high strung and independent 3 year old is only wonderful when she is being good and her feelings are not hurt.  At other times her emotions overwhelm us both.  Her sensitivity lends itself to enormous fits that are hard for her (or me) to get under control.  I actually took her to the doctor when she was almost 18 months old because I could not get her to stop crying and screaming and I thought something was wrong.  There was a nurse there with 6 kids who said she had 2 like mine and that there was nothing wrong – I just had a “live wire”.  She was right.  Her independence can turn to rudeness and a complete disregard for the rules and the feelings of those around her (usually me).  She lashes out at her brother and can hurt him when she is very angry.  She is trying to control her temper but sometimes I lose mine before she can.

I have held her down and buckled her into the car while she was kicking and screaming to get her out the door.  I hate this.  I have screamed at her, and not just to get out of the street or hold my hand in a parking lot.  I have actually screamed “Sophia Elise, What are you thinking?”!  She cried and she told me that I was scary.  I would like to say that the heart break I felt at that moment kept me from ever screaming again, but it has not.  In fact, there have been times when she is so bad I have considered giving her spanking, even though my husband and I decided we did not want to parent this way.  If you are wondering, so far Miles is laid back and calm.  Thank God for small miracles.  I do every day.  His temper fits are few and far between and they are manageable.  While still overwhelming due to the pitch of his screams, he is not directing anger at me.  That makes me able to deal.

To remain calm is my biggest challenge as a mother.  I, like Sophia, am outspoken and passionate about the things I love.  It took me a long time growing up to learn to be calm.  The minute I had a toddler I had to start re-learning this precious skill.  I have screamed, I have physically put them in their car seats while they were pitching a fit.  I have put my toddlers in their cribs and let them cry while I cried in another room or took a moment of quiet on my porch.  Not only am I scary to them, I am sometimes scared of how angry a 3-year old and an 18-month old can make me.  Thank God I have friends (both bloggy buddies and in real life) and family who tell me that I am not insane.  My lovely friends have reminded me that they understand how very scary angry toddlers and pre-schoolers can be themselves.   They are right.

Still, I never thought I would be a seriously Scary Mommy to my kids.  This is my confession.

If you ever read this, my babies, I love you and I have screamed at myself and I have cried and I have apologized for being so angry with you and for losing my temper.  I never meant to scare you.  You are all parts of my heart, and I will always be here for you.

You can open your eyes.  Well, there you have it.  Or at least some of it.   I am a mom and I am not perfect.  I am a person and I will always be striving to be better.  Yes, parts of me are a SCARY MOMMY, but I okay with who I am.  I am a good mom.  I adore my kids and my husband – so much it sometimes scares me.

If you enjoyed this post – please make sure to check out the other Scary Mommy entries at Scary Mommy.  Also please vote for me in the comments section of her post!  There will be a winner!

Like this post? Don’t want to miss a Mommy Words Moment? Then subscribe via RSS or by email to get all the latest from this Mom’s mouth! You can also use the social buttons below to add this post to your favorite sites or send it to your friends. Please spread the MOMMY WORDS!

Right now we have my sister Katie (will be contributing soon) and her 3 year old twins living with us while she finds a new place to live in Charlotte.  We live in a bungalow in Elizabeth that seemed large before we had kids, seemed just about right with 2 kids and now feels rather tight.  Now, I know that we are blessed to have this wonderful home and I know that we have more than others, but still, it is hard to count my blessings some days with all the screaming and gymnastics and messes that go on.

We have the time out corners down, we have a dinner time and play time and bed time ritual: all is going well.  We really feel like we are doing well with 4 kids under 4 in one house. 

Then, out of the blue, we are driving in the car and Sam, my nephew says “Shut the F*#@ up!” .  We almost crashed.  While I do not have a perfect mouth, I do not say this.   This is really bad.  Even though we are in the car, we are afraid that someone has heard this foul potty mouthed boy.   There was no need to ask him “What did you just say?” as it was clearer than any word he has ever spoken (of course).  So we responded by telling him that was a bad word and that when we use words like that we need to go to time out and take a break from play.  Lily (Sam’s twin) told us a boy in daycare had said this word and got a time out.  We said thank you Lily for exposing the teacher of the word, and re-iterated that Sam would have a time out when we got home.

The problem is, time out did not work.  This phrase was so upsetting that immediately all of the kids learned that it got our attention faster than anything else.  And so, our brilliant time out corner failed.  Sam sat down and seemed quiet until we realized he was whisepring this dirty little phrase and smiling.  Now we were stuck.  He was sort of being quiet but the little noise that was coming out was terrible and he was enjoying saying this and both Sophia and Lily kept laughing at what he was whispering.  It was like this dirty word was a magnet.  Previously, all the kids knew to stay away from those in time out.  Now, our beautiful structure was gone.

Katie decided that it was not okay even to whisper and told Sam that he should not use that word, even in a whisper, and that he would have to start his 3 minutes over.   Well, he gave a monster look to us, took a deep breath, and screamed that nasty phrase at the top of his lungs.  Over and over.  We were all stunned!

The house has never seemed smaller.  My neighborhood seemed small at this moment as I was sure everyone could hear this terrible outburst.  We did not know what to do.  When I was little I definitely would have gotten a spanking or, more likely, have my mouth washed out with soap.  The pic above is from the movie “A Christmas Story” – not our home.   In this day and age, those options are off the table so we were stuck with time out.  We told Sam that we do not speak to boy who use that language and that when he was ready to speak like a big boy we would talk to him.  Really I think we both had a slight urge after many minutes of just saying it right back to him, but we refrained as we summoned every ounce of adulthood we possess.

It took Sam about 20 minutes of screaming this to finally calm down.  We are dealing with these outbursts and they are getting shorter but they still happen.  Children’s counselors say that it normally gets worse before it gets better so we are waiting.  And cringing each and every time this comes out.  I just pray that he does not say it in front of people, but I am sure this is a wasted prayer.  Kids repeat what they hear and they seem to find really shocking things more interesting than the regular old conversation.

Life as a mom or aunt or any guardian is never easy, but this is the worst yet.  I will let you know if we survive.  Right now I want to crawl into an unoccupied corner of my house and dream of having a really obedient toddler.