Sophia is intensely interested in my doodles and has started doodling herself.  She is self-conscious about her shapes and her color choice.  She worries that her drawings do not look like mine.  I tell her I have been practicing my doodles since I was a little girl, and I still have room to grow.  I also reveal to hear that doodles are perfect because they are from you.  They are your feelings laid on paper.  They are colors and shapes and emotions.  In short, they are what they are and they are a part of you.  It is personal art and there is no right or wrong.

Today I was doodling as the kids and I practiced drawing the famous Mo Willem’s pigeon.  I am simply faster at drawing the pigeon and my nature makes me immediately start to color while I wait.  We try to draw or color every day.  Usually we have some time where the coloring books are out and some time where we practice drawing something.  This is not forced by me, they want to learn to draw.  I am no great drawing master, but my prowess with basic shapes is advanced to them, so I will do as a teacher for the time being.

I doodled my usual mix of colors and shapes with Sophia’s new glitter gel pens.  I loved the smooth ink and the sparkling result and continued to doodle after the kids had finished, wanting to complete my tiny picture thought.

When I looked up, Sophia had a new piece of paper and was beginning her own tiny doodle.  My heart swelled as I realized she was imitating me.  There will only be so many years she will do this, I know.  Soon she will embrace her independence in every way and have her own inspiration for drawing and everything else.  But today, she wanted to draw like her Mommy.  She was disappointed, but I was so proud. A doodle is never a disappointment.

These shapes are tiny and something about my crazy type A personality loves fitting the colorful puzzle together.  These entire drawings are about 3 inches wide.  It is hard for Sophia.  She has never made a puzzle of shapes before.  She has never worked in such a tiny area of a blank page.  She is fast becoming an expert at basic shapes, but this is something different.  I think she rocked it.  It may not look like much, but for a 5 year old with a tiny area and ultra fine point pens, this was no easy beginning.

After a few minutes, she asked me if we could trade pictures.  She said my doodle made her happy.  I told her I usually tape my doodles into my journal.  She has recently started her own journal and said she thought my drawing would be beautiful in it.  I asked her if I could per her drawing, her first real doodle, in mine.

A doodle for a doodle and we both have what we wanted, a beautiful piece of each others hearts.

We love keeping a journal and for kids a doodle journal can be a great thing!  We write the date at the top of each page and then the kids are free to draw or write words or feelings throughout the day.  There are pages that Sophia says are private and there are many she shares with me.  I feel honored.

What do your children want to imitate?  Are they nervous about their art or excited to try new things?  Do you journal or doodle still?  I can’t be the only one!

I must confess we thought Sophia was totally ready to ditch her training wheels this past spring, but we held off. She wanted to focus on getting her swim band and all the kids on our block were obsessed with scooters.  Her bike was really abandoned for a few months.

We knew she had the balance, strength and coordination to do it.  Her training wheels were way off the ground (this helps them learn to balance the bike) and she could ride like the wind.  Training wheels are not fun.  The are awkward on turns and honestly, she could not go as fast as her friends without training wheels.  Still, she wasn’t focused on riding a bike at all.

Then one afternoon we saw a Sesame Street clip on the computer of a little boy learning to ride a bike and the same day saw a Max and Ruby where Ruby does the same.  While I have no powers of persuasion, Ruby is a real leader.

Sophia begged to take those wheels off right after dinner and we obliged.  I hate those training wheels.  The first time I thought she did great, but we were all afraid of our street and her falling.  Also, dude, it totally sucks to run behind a child on a bike as they almost kill you with swerving.  It is back breaking.  The next night was easier.  We sort of just helped balance her as we jogged along side her.  Still, she had not fallen and we knew that to really learn full balance, we had to let go.

We went to a big museum parking lot with a big field next to it.  Ross gave her a push on the grass and she pedaled.  Finally, she fell.  But she got it.  They say three times a charm, right?  In that empty parking lot she totally ditched the training wheels.

Last weekend she went on a bike outing with her 7 year old friend Sean.  They were gone for almost two hours!  We were worried.  She was fine.  She can totally ride a bike!  She is working on some mean turns now.

I am proud and I am scared.  She can now crawl, walk, run, scooter, swim or ride away.  I am not going to think about driving.  It is just too much.

* I am linking up to the awesome Liz and Kristin for iPhone Photo Phun.  The pics were taken with my neighbor’s blackberry.  Yeah, blackberry people, your cameras are like doo doo.  I know, I had one.

Sophia absolutely loved it…and the yummy brownie.

This year as we were strolling along the beach we stopped strolling when we saw something sticking out of the tide as it rolled out.  It looked like the top of a large shell to me.  We eagerly started digging and found a giant conch shell!  As the morning progressed we dug up at least 40 huge conch (with nothing left inside except sand of course) and collected them to make a giant palace.  As we were admiring our hard earned shells, Sophia said she wanted a sea-shell treasure hunt at her birthday party.  With that, the ocean theme was born.

With every birthday party for young kids we try to have activities to keep them all busy and we always involve the kids in the planning and execution.  They love having a hand in their parties!  For the ocean theme we decided on simple blue and green ribbons, streamers and balloons for decoration highlighted by our DIY carnival style ocean games.  There is no need to go overboard with decor.  I promise – your kids will love balloons.  You already knew that though, didn’t you?

Here’s the lowdown on how we put together the party!  I will be posting a full DIY on the Octopus, Mermaid and Jellyfish so stay tuned!

The Invitations

We made these clam shell invitations on the computer and printed them out on some excess gold sparkly paper I had from my wedding!  Actually, this was the last of the paper but we have used it for every girl’s birthday party yet!  A little glitter paper and a little sparkle go a LONG way.

The Party Girl

As usual, Sophia wanted to be in costume.  This time she was a mermaid and for the first time in her life, she had the long hair she has been longing for since she was not even two.

Activities

We had a ball with these games…both making and playing them!

Ocean Freeze Dance – We made a huge ocean mix of fab songs like Wipe Out and Teenie Weenie Bikini and all things Nemo and Little Mermaid.  It was the soundtrack for the whole party.

Octopus Toss (Like Bean Bag Toss / Cornhole for kids) – we had fun making this and the kids still play with it every day!

Sea Shell Throw (Like the old Bozo Buckets)

Pin the Shell on the Mermaid – we made this gorgeous mermaid for this game and Sophia will hang it in her room as soon as I build a frame.  It was so simple and cheap and she really is a beauty!

Sea Sketch (Simple ocean outline with a pile of sidewalk chalk for kids to draw ocean creatures)

Jellyfish Pinata

Seashell Flashlight Hunt with Glow Necklaces and Necklace Flashlights – this was a HUGE hit.  We ordered glow necklaces in bulk and let the kids put them together as we waited for the sunset.  Then we handed out tiny necklace flashlights that were $7 for a dozen!  We hid hundreds of clam shells all over the yard and had the kids search for them.  Here is Miles in his necklace.

Food

We fed the kids dinner as the party was at 5:30 p.m.  It was simple: hot dogs, fruit, goldfish and macaroni and cheese.  The kids munched away and were rewarded with the goodies from the Jellyfish pinata and the Mermaid Fin brownie!  Yum!

Party Favors

The kids took home their glow necklace and flashlight as well as a giant conch they got to choose out of a big basket.  We wrote Love, Sophia on the inside with gold paint pen.

Overall the party was a big hit and once again, I am so glad to have not only the memories of Sophia and all her friends at the party, but of all the projects we did together getting ready for her big day!

Sophia’s birthday happens to be just 20 days after the kindergarten cutoff here in Charlotte.  We have been thinking about this since she was moved from the 2′s to the 3′s in pre-school a few years ago.  We knew she would finish the 4 year old class and then watch her friends go to kindergarten.  We worried about it.  We watched her befriend kids a year or more older than her with ease.

So we called the elementary school.  We asked about early admission to Charlotte-Mecklenburg schools.  It is possible.  With a birthday so close to the cutoff we would have to get her tested in IQ, reading and math and then have her evaluated by the school.  She would not have to be a raging genius, she would have to score in the 98th percentile for kids her age in IQ and then in either reading or math skills and have the recommendation of the counselor who administers the tests.

We watched Sophia and asked her 4′s teacher about her “place” amongst her peers who would be attending kindergarten.  With no red flags and a little girl was begging to go to kindergarten, we decided to have her tested.

She was actually excited when we walked into the office for 2 hours of testing.  I was nervous.  Almost nauseous. As a parent, you know your kid has got something, but you never know what.  It’s just crazy to send a 4 year old for IQ testing.   We prepared ourselves for everything from major learning issue to genius to crazy unexplainable to average awesome 4 year old girl.  If I am being totally honest, after years of thinking she was just a little ahead, we actually did remind ourselves that having any expectations was unfair to her and not right as a parent.  Still, you always want the best news. She came out happy and chatty but we did not know anything for a few weeks.

When we met with the counselor we left with the knowledge that Sophia was in fact intellectually and socially ready for kindergarten.  She was fine in IQ and far above her peer level in math (we had no idea) and above average in reading skills.  However, there was a big but.  In Charlotte a good number of parents specifically hold their children, usually boys, back a year.  I don’t know why other than worrying they are not ready or wanting them to be bigger, but it raised concern for our Sophia going to Kindergarten.  You see, with all the kids being held back there would be an almost 2 year age difference between the youngest and oldest kindergarteners and the counselor wanted us to think about this not just in terms of elementary school but as she aged.  Would we want our 13 year old in class with 15 year old boys?  What about having a 19 year old pick our 16 year old up for a date?  You know I am all kinds of afraid of sex so this really got me thinking.  I should have thought more about Sophia and less about the other “stuff”.

At the end of the day, we decided to find her a transitional kindergarten and told her it was because her birthday was extra special and that she would be super ready for kindergarten when she went.

We have had a month of school and we regret our decision.  Not only is Sophia unhappy that she is not in kindergarten, she says she is bored all the time both at school and at home.  Her TK has not even started the workbooks she was so exited about.  At home, you know we always have a million art projects and fun things around here.  She wants to be in school with friends for a full day.  Those were her exact words.  At first, my feelings were hurt.  I wondered why she did not want to spend more time with me.  She said she loved me very much, but that she was just as grown up as her friends and she wanted to be with them.  I get it.  Sophia has been a social uber extrovert since she was a baby.  She thrives in large groups and likes a challenge.  She is friends with 7 year olds already.  She can hold her own.

I don’t know why we underestimated her.

Now, it seems that our school district has added a K1 class to help deal with the age issue.  The older and more advanced kids have been placed in a kindergarten / 1st Grade class and the younger normal kindergarteners are in regular old kindergarten.  Had we known this, our decision would have been different.  We would have met with the school to send her this year.

We are now faced with a decision.  Do we leave her in her TK class and try to find extra activities in the afternoon?  Do we proceed with trying to start her now, since it has only been a month since school started?  Do we find and pay for one year of private kindergarten and then send her next year with the possibility she will then be in the K1 class?  We honestly feel like she should be in “real” school now, but is it too late?

Right now I am exploring all of our options while the thought that I failed my daughter tickles my brain.  These cutoffs are meant to send the kids to kindergarden who are supposed to be there, and we knew that is where she belonged.  We knew she would love it.  We knew our own daughter.  At the end of the day, as parents, we know our small children better than the counselors or the schools.  I need to remember that as we enter into the days when our kids are gone as much as they are here.  It is my job to pay attention and be an advocate for my child.  As a parent who plans on sending my children to public school, it is my job to be as active as possible and make sure that she and her classmates are getting what they need.  It is my job to fight for my kids when 20 days on a calendar keep them from what is right for them.   I want to listen to my kids and take them seriously when the matter is serious.  She told us what she wanted, she tested appropriately to move ahead and still we doubted her.

It is a mistake I hope we will not make again.

Question:  When do your kids go to kindergarten?  Do you have similar issues with age gaps due to holding kids back?  I am curious as to how the world works for school aged kids outside of Charlotte.  Thanks!

Sophia my love,

5 years ago you were swimming in my body, just 20 days from being in my arms.

4 years ago you clung to our necks as we swirled you around in the pool and splashed in the ocean.

3 years ago you leapt off the side of the pool, your laugh filling the air, as you flew into our arms.

2 years ago you held on tight to our necks as we pulled you through the water.  We held you as you learned to kick and stroke.  You wanted to swim.

1 year ago you were proud of your skill with a floatie.  Without one, you began to swim.  From a short distance, you would swim into our arms, into safety.

We told you we would never let anything happen to you.  We told you that you could swim.  We made sure you knew you were strong enough.  Still, you wanted to swim to us and always back to where we were.  That was okay by us.

This summer you learned to swim away.  You cautiously let go of our necks, let go of the concrete walls, and embraced your new ability.  You worked hard, you had a goal.  If you could learn to swim across the pool without any help from anyone, you would earn your yellow band from the YMCA.  With that yellow band, you could go down the water slides.  By yourself.  Into water deeper than you are tall.

It took all summer, but you earned that band.  We are so proud of you.  It took strength and bravery and a new independence to finish that test.  And you did it.  You are amazing.

We just want you to know, as you swim away from us more and more each day, that we are  here for you.  No matter what, please know that we miss holding you tight and you are always welcome in our arms.  Even if you are getting all grown up…

We love you baby.

Mom and Dad

* I am linking up to the awesome Liz and Kristin for iPhone Photo Phun.  The first pic was taken with my husband’s blackberry and the second with some awesome camera app for my iPhone where pictures look almost as good as with my big girl camera.

Then, last week, I heard a bloodcurdling scream.

Sophia:  Mom!  Come here!  Help!

I ran to her room, afraid something terrible had happened.  I found her sitting on her bed, staring at a brush.

Me:  Sophia, is everything okay?

She looked up.  There were tears on her cheeks.

Sophia:  Mom, look at my brush.  It is taking my hair away.

I looked at the brush and observed the few shiny strands that so upset her.

Me:  Sophia, the hair that comes out when you brush is leaving the good hair to grow longer.  That hair in the brush will not grow anymore.   Don’t worry, it is normal.

Sophia:  Normal?  To lose hair?  Uh uh.  That is not okay.  I do not want to lose any hair.  That is ridiculous.  (Yes, she likes this word.)

Me:  Ridiculous is a bit dramatic sweetie.  What is your plan?  I don’t want you to cry over your beautiful hair.

Sophia.  It’s simple.  I am not brushing my hair anymore.  I am just going to let it grow.  That’s my plan okay?

Me:  I know you are upset babe, but your hair will grow.  It just might take longer than some of your friends.  Mommy’s hair took a long time to grow too.  It really would be better to keep brushing it to keep it healthy.

Sophia:  Uh uh.  I don’t want it coming out.

At this point I went the wrong direction.  I admit it.  Bad move mom.

Me:  Sophia, you have beautiful hair.  Some little girls are sick and have no hair.  They wear bandananas or wigs while they get better and they would be so happy to be healthy like you and have your hair.

Sophia:  What’s a wig?

Me:  It is hair that goes over your head to give you hair or make your hair look different.  A lot of healthy people grow their own hair as long as they can and then cut it all off to help people who don’t have hair.  Your cousin Claire did it.

Sophia:  No way.  I don’t want to cut my hair and I just want it long and it is my hair.

Me:  Okay Soph, it is your hair, and you don’t have to cut it. I was just telling you how lucky you are.   If it gets too snarly though, I am telling you even more will come out when we brush it.  And we will brush it.  At least one time each day.  I will be careful.

Sophia:  We’ll see.

We’ll see?  From a 4 year old?

Well, I choose my battles and I am not winning this one.  I thought it would blow over.  She looks like she has a bird’s nest on her head and she bawls when we brush her hair.  She insists on looking at the brush when we are done.  I have thus far refrained from telling her that she may draw bird poop, but I am close.  Even Ross is wondering what I am planning with this one.  Miles is 3 and thinks she looks funny.

Here’s the thing.  I have no plan.  I don’t want her to think I don’t listen and care and I don’t want a mama bird to lay an egg on her head either.  I also would just like her hair to look pretty.  Sue me.  I like that about having a girl.

Any ideas?  Can I keep the peace or must I attack her precious hair with a brush?  What  

I also happen to be a lover of Charlie Brown and the Peanuts gang and also a giant amusement park fan.  So, it is no wonder that I jumped at the chance to attend a media preview of Snoopy’s Starlight Spectacular at Carowinds.

Even better, I got to bring a date and I chose my daughter Sophia, who is just as impressed by glittering things as I am.  She picked out her prettiest white dress to prepare for the event.  In her words, “Mom, if this is a party I am wearing a party dress”.  She looks like a wonderful addition to the media in my humble opinion.

We sort of have a thing for meeting characters and have been known to wait in line for hours to meet certain princesses with very long hair at Disney.  We make our own autograph books and they rock! I thought my husband might die in line.  It turns out at a media event there are no lines.  It totally rocked.  We met the whole peanuts gang!  I had a mom fail moment as I did not realize this would happen and did not make her an autograph book like we do for Disney.  She forgave me after I promised I would have one for the next time.

After s’mores and Sprite in snoopy cups and some fun times with Bloggy friends Lisa, Jen and Maricris, the light show began!

There were millions of sparkling lights all through Planet Snoopy and I was so happy.  While it was not the spectromagic parade I am in love with, it was really enchanting.  I must admit I am a Peanuts fan, so the character cut outs made me and Sophia smile.

We got glow necklaces that were a huge hit and still are, weeks later when we light them up in the house.

There were spinning Peanuts shapes on the ground and fun music to dance to.  Yes, I always dance when music is played and my daughter is no different.  We shook our tail feathers!

So, Carowinds has gone all out with this Snoopy’s Starlight Spectacular and even added a nightly fireworks show!  I. Love. Fireworks.

We’ve got our season passes and they have more than paid for themselves already.  Now we are just waiting for our next date night.  We will go at night, ride the biggest coasters and see the light show.  It will totally rock.

If you are coming through the Carolinas, consider a trip to Carowinds.  Thrills and lights and tons of rides for kids makes for a very good time!

Anyone else want me to be Media, because I loved my first real media event!

Disclosure: Carowinds invited me and a guest to the preview of the Snoopy Starlight Spectacular.  My opinions are my own.

Sophia:  Mommy, you just have to brush your hair gently every night to get hair like Rapunzel’s.  Healthy hair does not have tangles.  Also, you need to go to sleep every night, because sleep is healthy.  That is a fact.  I will do whatever I can for my hair, you know.

Me:  Yes sweetie, I know.  Your hair is beautiful as it is, but I know you want the longest hair in the world.  It will be a lot of work to have hair that long.

Sophia:  It will be beautiful though, don’t you think?

Me:  Of course babe.

Sophia:  Well, that is enough brushing.  (She carefully lays her princess brush on the table next to her bed)

The sun was setting over her bed and for a moment she was glowing in its last rays.  She looked up and closed her eyes.

Sophia:  Ah, the sun.  The sun makes me cry and the sun makes me die.  Crying and dying, that is the sun.

Me:  Sophia, the sun is beautiful.  What do you mean?

Sophia:  When the sun is bright and you look at it you might cry.  When the sun goes down, you might die.  Crying and dying. (She begins to sing this over and over…crying and dying, crying and dying.  I think this is totally strange.)

Me:  Sophia the sun is bright and we don’t look right at it but I have never seen you cry.  And honey,  we are all alive and we will not die when the sun goes down.  People can die when they are sick or when they are old and it is time.  It is not because the sun goes down.

Sophia:  Hmmm, I like how it sounds because it rhymes.  Crying and Dying in the sun!

Me:  That’s heavy Soph, I love rhymes too but what about bright and light is the sun? That rhymes too.

The light changed and she really seemed contemplative, as much so as a 4 year old could be.

Sophia:  Mom, do you know something?  When you get really old, like 100 years old, you start to shrink.  And when you are really really old, like 115, you shrink so much (she moves two fingers together) that you totally disappear and then you die when you are tiny.

Me:  I know that sometimes as people get older their bones and muscles change so they seem shorter, but they do not get so tiny they disappear sweetie.  When people die they are not tiny.

Sophia:  I really think they are, and I also know that it is dark.

Me:  (Speechless)

Sophia:  Mom, Violet is quiet.  I am not scared, so I am ready to go to sleep.

Me:  Oh – okay.  Well, I love you.  Kisses.  Best friends forever.

Sophia:  Best friends forever Mom.  I love you too.

A few thoughts on this, the strangest conversation I have had thus far with my firstborn child.

First, I may have over emphasized the evil aspects of the sun as I religiously apply and re-apply sunscreen.  Just maybe I should refrain from saying “I am saying in this heat” or “this sun is killing me”.

Second, I realize that I did not say much in this conversation.  I was basically dumbfounded as I listened to her.  I still don’t know what else I could have said, but maybe there was a better way to respond?

Third, I am going to gloss over this and pretend that it makes her some sort of tiny genius, who thinks about things far beyond her years and will someday be able to support me in her old age due to her brilliance.

Fourth, as I sit here, it sort of sounds nice to get tiny and then leave this world as tiny as we started in our mothers’ womb.  I imagine a little light that finally disappears into the heavens.  It sounds a lot nicer than the way most people actually go.  Also,  thinking these things makes me pretty certain that she she is my child.  Clearly she inherited my penchant for carrying odd thoughts to their conclusion.

Finally, I think this is just the beginning.  Hold me, this is going to be quite the ride.

Please tell me your children have said some crazy things too!  I would love to know I am not alone.

It is just pre-school, I know.  But my baby is not a baby anymore.  When her name was called she walked to the stage as a little girl poised to become a young woman.  It was almost surreal to watch her.  I see her at 4 and saw her being 14 in no time.   She has told me she is ready to grow up.  I want more time.  But I will let her go, and let her grow.

She brings home papers every day.  The memory box is stuffed with handprints and collages and love letters from a daughter to her mother.  This paper is different.  It is the first hard core piece of proof positive evidence that she is not a baby.  She has a diploma people.  A real diploma.

We came home from school and started an art project, as usual.  She started talking about how big she was and then she said she wanted to get married.  She had tons of questions about marriage and how it works and when you find someone and how you know what love is.  I was sort of freaking out as the picture of Ross giving her away popped into my head.

How fast was all this growing up going to go?  What if I missed something?  How could we slow things down a little?  I am so proud of her, but I feel real pain as I say goodbye to the days of my firstborn being anything other than a little lady.

When I tucked her in, she brought up marriage again.  She wanted to know if she would live with her husband in another house.  I told her that usually married couples want to get their own house so they have privacy.  Well, my prayers were answered.  She told me if that was how marriage was she isn’t ready, because right now she wants to live with me me forever.  I kissed her beautiful face and said “that’s great babe, because right now mommy wants that too.”

Congratulations Sophia!  Mommy is so proud of you!

What a perfect way to get a picture of all three of my Crazy Wonderful kids!

Go ahead…make one…it’s free!  And the quote boxes…well I just love them.